A Very Mizzie Prom
by Roses for Ophelia
Summary: Just a few ridiculously silly stories about the Mizzies going to prom. Part of the tried-and-true sub-sub genre of Put-Mizzies-In-A-Weird-Situation-And-See-What-Happens.
1. Chapter 1

Just some cute litte one-shots about the Mizzies going to prom, because i feel like being silly.

* * *

Marius and Cosette

_Marius is sitting on a bench in Cosette's garden. She is in her Catholic school uniform, Marius in street clothes._

MARIUS- Have you asked your father about prom yet?

COSETTE- Not yet. ( she is quiet a moment.) Marius, I really don't think he's going to let me go.

MARIUS- Why not?

COSETTE- He doesn't approve of me having boyfriends. To tell the truth, I haven't even told him about you yet.

MARIUS- So, sneak out!

COSETTE- I can't do that to my father—he'll worry.

MARIUS- Everyone does it!

COSETTE- I was raised better than that, Marius. I'm sorry, but I can't come to prom with you.

MARIUS-What? Cosette, if you don't go, I won't have a date!

COSETTE- What about that Eponine girl? I hear she's nice, and I always thought she kind of had a crush on you.

MARIUS- She's a psycho! I caught her writing Mrs. Eponine Pontmercy on her notebooks in science class.

COSETTE- So?

MARIUS- I am _not_ going to prom with Eponine. Besides, her father's kinda poor; I don't even think she can afford a dress.

COSETTE- Well, aren't all your friends going?

MARIUS- Friends?

COSETTE- The ones who hang out at the Musain. Aren't they going? Just go with them. I'm sure some of them don't have dates.

MARIUS- I am _not_ going to prom with any of them. I don't want anyone thinking we're gayer than they already do.

COSETTE- Oh please, Marius, like there isn't _something_ going on between Joly and Bossuet. Besides, I didn't mean that. I meant, just go in a group. Lots of people do it.

MARIUS- Right. Last time I hung out with them, Combeferre made me feel like a phenomenal idiot.

COSETTE- What did he do?

MARIUS- (getting embarrassed) He…said something.

COSETTE-What did he say?

MARIUS- He said ' to be free.'

COSETTE- I don't under—

MARIUS- It's complicated. Anyway, I am not hanging out with the school's biggest stoner, the emo poet, the resident nerd, the hypochondriac, the bald one, the one with anger issues, Apollo, Don Juan, and Poland Guy.

COSETTE- Poland Guy!?

MARIUS- It's complicated. Be glad you don't sit next to him in World History. Anyway, Cosette, you've just got to go! If you don't go, I won't go either!

COSETTE- Fine, it's settled!

MARIUS- Wait, what?

COSETTE- Neither of us will go! (Marius starts to leave) Where are you going?

MARIUS- I'm going to see if I remember Azelma's number. She doesn't talk much, but at least she isn't a Catholic school girl or a psycho.


	2. Chapter 2

Apparently, at least some of Les Amis have fake IDs—did you think they wouldn't?

* * *

Enjolras

_Grantaire, Bossuet, Joly and Bahorel are sitting around a table in the Musain, wearing tuxedos which are hidden under large trench coats, looking impatient._

BOSSUET- Are you sure this'll work?

JOLY- Since when has Courfeyrac been wrong—don't answer that.

BAHOREL- I'm telling you, he won't fall for it.

JOLY- We've got to try, all the same! He's gone through four years of high school without so much as a date—he's got to go to prom!

GRANTAIRE- This'll never work! He's a freaking statue! He doesn't even look at women!

BAHOREL- Has anyone ever wondered if Enjolras is a little---

JOLY- (sitting entirely too close to Bossuet) A little what?

BAHOREL- ( eyeing them suspiciously) Never mind. Anyway, where are they? They should have been back by now.

JOLY- You know Courfeyrac, can't go anywhere without a few chicks stopping him.

BOSSUET- And you know Enjolras, he can't go anywhere without stopping a few chicks—or knocking them over.

_The door opens. Courfeyrac and Enjolras enter, Enjolras looking slightly suspicious, Courfeyrac with a huge grin on his face, also with his formal wear hidden under a large coat._

COURFEYRAC- Well, well, look who it is! Our dearest friends! Enjolras, don't you think we should sit down and have a beer?

ENJOLRAS- ( he suspects something is up.) You said you had some top secret documents for me--

COURFEYRAC- I did—do. But that can wait, can't it?

ENJOLRAS- Revolutionaries should always be in a hurry.

COURFEYRAC- And I am—in a hurry to get a beer. Come on, sit down for a minute, Enjolras. It won't kill you.

_Enjolras sighs, and sits next to Grantaire, who has stopped drinking to stare at him. Enjolras gives him a disdainful look, but otherwise ignores him._

COURFEYRAC- There, isn't that better! Where's Louison? Bahorel, shouldn't you get Louison?

BAHOREL- Good idea.

_He pops up from the table and leaves the room._

ENJOLRAS- Isn't it a little warm for those coats?

JOLY- (quickly) Haven't you heard? We're in danger of losing body heat because the Earth's magnetic field is slowly disintegrating due to Global Warming. (Enjolras looks even more suspicious.)

BOSSUET- You wouldn't happen to know what day it is, would you Enjolras?

ENJOLRAS- The—fifth, I think.

BOSSUET- And nothing's—happening today, is it?

ENJOLRAS- Not that I know of.

BOSSUET- That's good.

ENJOLRAS- Why?

BOSSUET- (casually) Oh, just had that feeling.

_Bahorel returns with a pretty girl on his arm._

BAHOREL- Well, I'm back.

ENJOLRAS- Weren't you getting Louison?

BAHOREL- I found someone better. (pushing the girl forward.) Enjolras, this is Emilia.

ENJOLRAS- (coldly) Nice to meet you. ( quietly, to Bahorel) Bahorel, what do you think you're doing? You know we don't bring chicks into the back room! Bros before hos!

BAHOREL- Why not? It's a free country.

EMILIA- If only it were.

ENJOLRAS- (interested in spite of himself) You do not think so?

EMILIA- Oh, I'm sure it is—in theory. But the corporations are too busy making money and buying the government's votes, so they really can't protect our first amendment rights. Besides, with the Christian Right censoring everything that offends them, denying marriage rights to all citizens, and crusading to overturn women's rights to choose, how can we truly call ourselves 'free?'

ENJOLRAS- (really interested now.) Tell me more.

COURFEYRAC- ( high fiving Bahorel behind Enjolras' back.) Score!

BAHOREL- Well, well, look at the time! Isn't it time to go?

ENJOLRAS- Go where?

BAHOREL- Oh, just for a little drive. Come on everyone.

_Everyone gets up, Emilia pulling Enjolras out of his seat.. _

EMILIA- Come on, Enjolras, we can talk in the car.

COURFEYRAC- (snickering) Yes…talk….

ENJOLRAS- Did you say something?

COURFEYRAC- No, no, not at all. Come on everyone, let's go, we'll be late.

ENJOLRAS-Where are we—

EMILIA- What do you think about the Glass-Steagall Act?

ENJOLRAS- Don't get me started…

COURFEYRAC- ( To Grantaire, as he leaves) You owe me ten bucks.


	3. Chapter 3

This one's a little sadder than usual, but I really couldn't think of anything else that worked. Apparently, Fantine goes to a Catholic school as well.

* * *

Fantine

_Fantine is in the girls' bathroom, throwing up as quietly as possible in a stall. Favorite is doing her make up in the mirror._

FAVORITE- So, Blachevelle and I—Fantine are you listening?

FANTINE- Umm-hmm.

FAVORITE- We decided that after prom, we can all chip and rent a hotel room, and have a major party.

FANTINE- Umm-hmm.

FAVORITE- Have you seen my dress? I was having such a problem choosing between the red and the purple, but I went with the red, and I was kinda regretting it at first, but now I'm totally happy. I mean, red looks so much better on me. What color's your dress?

FANTINE- I don't have a dress.

FAVORITE- Blondie, why not? I know you have a tendency to put off your homework and stuff, but this is important. This is _prom_. We only have a few more months! We totally have to go shopping, I'll take you.

FANTINE- I'm not going shopping.

FAVORITE- Why not?

FANTINE- (opening the stall door and coming out. She is wearing a very baggy shirt and jacket, which conceal her stomach.) Because I'm not going to prom.

FAVORITE- Blondie! What the hell! Why not?

FANTINE- ( as she washes her mouth out with water from the faucet.) Because I'm pregnant.

FAVORITE- Pregnant! Oh my god! When did this—

FANTINE- A few months ago. Tholomyés talked me into it. It was my first time, and I didn't want to ruin the mood by asking him to use a condom.

FAVORITE- Oh my god, Fantine, I had no idea! But I mean, how can anyone tell when you wear those big shirts all the time?

FANTINE- Some people can tell. The nuns found out—I don't know how. I think that Victurnien girl might have tipped them off—or maybe they just saw me throw up in the morning one too many times, saw my shirts and put two and two together. They won't let me go to prom.

FAVORITE- My god—why?

FANTINE- I don't live up to the standards of Catholic Education, I guess. I've been banned.

FAVORITE- Oh my god, Fantine, I'm so sorry.

FANTINE- Don't be. Even if I could go, I'd be six months pregnant—wouldn't look very good in a prom dress.

FAVORITE- That's just horrible. Someone should do something.

FANTINE- What?

FAVORITE- I don't know. Listen, at least you can come to the hotel with us afterward. That'll be something.

FANTINE- I guess so.

FAVORITE- It'll all be okay. The boys have promised us a big surprise—everything will be fine!

_Fantine and Favorite hug._


	4. Chapter 4

Back to silly! And apparently, this all takes place in New York, because New York=Paris. Kinda.

* * *

Eponine

_Azelma is sitting on her bed, watching Eponine primp in the mirror._

AZELMA- You aren't seriously going to ask him?

EPONINE- Why not? I mean, I know him pretty well, it's not like that Catholic School girl would really take him seriously.

AZELMA- Why not?

EPONINE- She's way out of his league. I mean, private school girls don't go out with boys who live in the projects; their daddies don't like it.

AZELMA- So you think he'll go with you?

EPONINE- Why the hell not? I'm pretty, aren't I?

AZELMA- Well….you could be. (Eponine looks mad) I mean, if you had your hair done all nice and a pretty dress and stuff.

EPONINE- Yeah, gotta figure out how to get my hands on a dress.

AZELMA- Speaking of pretty dresses, isn't your boyfriend gonna be mad if he finds out you asked out another guy?

EPONINE- Who, Parnasse? It's totally over between us—he's an asshole. Besides, he's more interested in how _he_ looks than how _I_ look. Talk about metrosexual! I need a real man.

AZELMA- And Pontmercy is a real man?

EPONINE- (considers that.) Well, one who doesn't go around with a switch blade, anyway.

AZELMA- So you're really gonna do it?

EPONINE- I'm gonna try.

AZELMA- What are you gonna say?

EPONINE- I don't know—I'm just gonna corner him when he gets back from stalking that convent girl in Central Park, and ask him.

AZELMA- You think he'll say yes?

EPONINE- I don't know—it's not like he's got any other girls waiting in the wings. He's scared shitless of girls.

AZELMA- You don't suppose he's a little—

EPONINE- No! He's got the hots for the convent girl, remember?

AZELMA- Oh, right.

EPONINE- ( turning to face Azelma) So how do I look?

AZELMA- Okay, I guess.

EPONINE- All right, I'm off! ( she opens the door.)

AZELMA- Take an umbrella, it's raining.

EPONINE- So? Rain never hurt anyone.

_She leaves_.


End file.
